Man. I have so many things on my mind tonight. From my money situation to my love life.
In this case it has to do with love. A past one I should say. And for some reason I keep running into this brick wall.
I feel like a crash test dummy. Or just a dummy. Eh. It’s nothing too emotional really.
That person has been through alot and we were something once, and I have to respect whatever feelings or lack of they may have. I guess I have this issue if I feel like people like me but feel the need to actually protect their heart FROM me. Then I feel like the soul-eating devil. Could I have possibly caused so much pain to one person? For that I’m sorry. But there seems to be nothing I can do no matter my feelings. So I leave with that…feeling of drifting.
That’s the only word I could think of.
Like I was like “hey get on the boat…” and instead of answering he just pushed the boat out to sea.
and that’s just where I’m at.
Out in the middle of no where. But by now…I’m pretty used to it. No love lost…or gained. It just is. Just contemplating it all really. Like…what it is that I’m doing wrong.
